Farting Facts: The Good, The Bad And The Smelly
Come on now, admit it.You do it.I do it.We all do it; and if you’re trying to deny it then you are either lying or dead (and even dead people do it too!)
So why is it such an embarrassing subject for so many people?
Nobody throws you out of the room if you cough; people actually give you their blessings when you sneeze so why do bottom burps create such a stir?
It is after all, a perfectly natural occurrence and something which the average person will perform around 14 times a day (that equates to half a litre of fart gas).If you’re unlucky, you might know and love someone who seems to have more than their fair share – power to them.(And that would be ‘Turbo power’!)
Where do farts come from?
Farts are formed from the gas in our intestines.
The composition of the gas we produce depends on these various conditions but generally contains differing levels of oxygen (not absorbed by the body), hydrogen, carbon dioxide, nitrogen and methane.Quite the chemical laboratory going on inside us isn’t it.
Why do farts smell?
Well, so the joke goes – it’s especially for the hearing impaired.But joking aside, the smell comes from the small amounts of hydrogen sulfide gas and mercaptans (these are responsible for that rotting cabbage smell) found in the mix.These compounds contain sulfur and it all depends on the diet you eat.If you eat a sulfur rich diet the smellier the farts will be.
Why are farts so noisy?
Not all farts are noisy (we have all been hideously subjected to the ‘SBD’ farts*).The noise is NOT created from the flapping of the butt cheeks as some people believe but actually is a result of the vibrating anal passage as the gas escapes.The quality of the sound depends on the velocity in which the gas escapes and the tightness of the sphincter muscles.
Farting champions: Men or Women?
Now many would believe that men fart more than woman.Technically, we all produce around the same amount but men are more generous with their farts and happy to share (bless ‘em!) Many women are a little shier about expressing themselves in a bodily noise kind of way so it could be that they actually ‘hold in’ their farts.Doing this doesn’t make the fart disappear, it just ‘stores’ them up for later release (at a more ‘convenient’ time).
Did you fart?
Believe it or not, there is actually a company called Fartypants who sell odour absorbing underwear!
For those who haven’t invested in a pair of Fartypants, it’s usually about finding some other sucker to blame.If you own a dog (or kids!) this can work out quite well.Or perhaps, just pointing to the person next to you with a disapproving look can get you off the hook.
But why not take the credit for your achievements?
My mum had a wonderful saying when we were kids:
“Where ever you may be, let your wind roam free.” So next time you feel one brewing, if you care – you’ll share; let’s all be LOUD and PROUD!
*SBD = silent, but deadly.
These farts come with no pre-warning.